Dear HOS: I Can’t Take Any ‘Snore’

(The posts I write and categorize as “Dear HOS” will be letters to my man. These brief letters will contain devotions of love, confessions of disappointment and thankfulness for our relationship. This topic will be a mixed bag of posts, but they will be genuine.)

Dear HOS,

I love you, and I missed you while you were away this weekend. The house seemed much emptier, the noises much louder and creepier, and the parenting was a little more difficult.

That being said…

I slept better than I have in weeks.

In recent weeks, I’ve rudely awakened you to let you know that you were snoring. LOUDLY. And despite my less-than-friendly midnight demands regarding nasal strips, you refused.

Tonight, though, you remembered! I don’t know if this was brought on by my threat of punching you in the face while you were sleeping or by you recognizing that your nasal congestion would amplify your snores.

It’s neither here nor there!

I greatly appreciate you remembering the nasal strips.


They do not work.

Each time you inhale, the air entering your nasal cavities makes a sound that makes the little hairs in my ears stand up. It’s like someone held a chalkboard next to my left ear and ran their fingernails down it, and then stretched cotton balls. It’s like that, only worse.

My left ear is tingling and achy. I finally gave up. I’m cuddled on the couch with our cat who keeps purring. Each purr grates on my tender ears.


I love you, HOS, and I’m grateful you wore the nasal strips, but it’s not enough. It’s time we deal with the snoring… Before I snap.

Oh, if you’re wondering where I am, I’m sleeping on the couch in the basement. It’s the safest distance.



On Marriage

Marriage isn’t for me. Wait. What?!

When a friend posted the blog, Marriage Isn’t for Me, on Facebook the other day, I was intrigued.

If you haven’t read this blog yet, I encourage you to take some time to read it. I really enjoy hearing/reading the male perspective on proposals and marriage. I believe our society has made marriage into a woman’s thing, especially the wedding. It’s rare for me to hear a man’s thoughts on the matter. It’s encouraging and inspirational. It also makes me believe men do care more about these things than they let on!

Not surprisingly, The blog moved me to tears. But my tears were inspired by the honesty, respect and honor of a father’s advice, and by the admission that its easy to forget this advice. I also cried because reading this blog made me think about my relationship with HOS.

If you know what HOS means – husband of sorts – you’ve probably picked up on the fact that we are not married, but we are blessed in many ways. Most importantly, we are blessed with Ms. Charli! I am not married, but I have been careful not to put too much pressure on HOS about the matter. I drop some hints and make jokes every now and again – I can’t let him forget! – but I know that nagging at him will get us no where.

After reading this blog, I realized that I have spent my life looking at marriage the wrong way. And when I really start to think about it, HOS already lives his life like this! Everything he does is for me and Charlotte, from the hours he works to the lifestyle he now lives.

I may not have a crazy production of a proposal and I may not have a ring (well, I have one my dad gave my mom), but I have a man who would do anything and already does everything for me. Am I doing the same for him?

I think so. I hope he thinks so…

Next time someone asks me when I’m getting married, I’ll do my best to remember that getting married isn’t for me. And if it isn’t for me, it sure as heck isn’t for all these other people either!

My Niece’s Love

I received a gift beyond measure today. The gift was so meaningful and so powerful it brought tears to my eyes.

I have loved and adored my niece for more than 13 years. I am so proud of the intelligent, caring, beautiful young woman she is becoming. My sister is one heck of a mom to raise this girl on her own.

I was only 13 years old when she was born, and I didn’t know the first thing about being an aunt. I loved dressing her like a mini me and playing with her. As I grew into the person I am today, and my nieces life changed, our relationship evolved.

I am proud to say that she is one of my closest friends. I’m honest with her even when the questions are tough. I tell her what is right, not what is easy. I don’t always tell her what she wants to hear, but she knows I mean well. And she knows that she can tell me anything. And as long as it isn’t anything dangerous or harmful, I keep her secrets.

I’m so grateful that HOS understands our bond. I told him once that if – God forbid – anything were to happen to my sister, I would fight tooth and nail to keep my niece with me. I would never lose her. He would fight for her by my side.

My goal, especially since becoming an adult, is to be a role model for my niece. I want to be someone she can turn to. Someone she can look up to. And someone she can be proud of.

Most people spend their whole lives never knowing the impact they have on another person. We never really know what sinks in or what matters. … But today, I learned that I am exactly who I wanted to be for my niece.

I received the greatest gift today in the form of a PowerPoint. My niece’s teacher sent it to my sister who shared it with me. The presentation was all about my niece – who she is, what she likes, what she wants to do when she grows up…

And on one of the last slides she wrote this:

“My Aunt taught me that if I’m not happy with something in my life that is in my control then change it – therefore I’m never unhappy with anything that is in my control.”

When I read that, I knew my mom would be proud of who I am. And I cried happy tears.

Lovey Dovey Eyes

HOS and I are hanging out with the nieces for a little while this evening while HOS’ sister and her husband look at houses. I have to go to the dentist soon about some filled cavities giving me discomfort, so I’m quickly dinner.

Since I’m preoccupied, HOS is walking up and down the block with a 5 and 2 year old, pushing Charli in a stroller.

Insert lovey dovey eyes here!

There is nothing more attractive than a man who is good with kids. He looked so great out there with the girls.

The first words out of his mouth when they returned was …

Let’s have more kids.

Bahaha. I had you for a second!

His words were actually something to the effect of “we’re never having kids.”

Too late, buddy!

What does your partner do to warrant the lovey dovey eyes?