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We Are Bullshit

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Image

A Facebook friend posted this image today. At first, I just scrolled past the post, but the dress silhouette caught my eye. It reminded me of the dress logo the American Heart Association uses to promote heart health for women so I went back.

I don’t know a single woman who could read this quote from Kate Winslet and not agree. I remember my mom drinking slim fast. My sister is always writing on Facebook about working out and losing weight. I even hear my grandma – at 74 years old – talk about feeling overweight. And my beautiful, athletic 12-year-old niece has opened up to me about how she “isn’t skinny.” Twelve. Years. Old.

I’m no different.

I just have one question for all of us women: What the hell is wrong with us?

Let’s set aside the cliche excuses where we blame pop culture, our parents or some previous relationship that ended badly.

We choose to focus on our “faults.” We choose to look at images of waif models and think the world demands that of us. We repeat the mistakes of our parents instead of learning from them, and we let some jerk damage our view of ourselves.

We are bullshit.

I weigh one tiny pound more than the day I found out I was pregnant, but if you asked me, I’d act like it’s the end of the world. I’m so fat. I don’t fit into my pre-pregnancy clothes. I have stretch marks on my hips, thighs, stomach and chest. Wah. Wah. Wah.

I’m tired of listening to myself. I’m sure people around me are tired of listening to my, too. And to those people, I am so sorry.

One seemingly insignificant image and quote from Kate Winslet opened my eyes today.

I have never heard the women around me speak proudly about their bodies or say that they are happy with their appearance.

I refuse to do that to my daughter.

Starting now – after I finish this wine and plate of cookies – I’m going to focus on what I like about my physical appearance, as well as my intellect and just plain awesome personality.

I’ll be writing a post soon about how I love my body. In the mean time, what do you love about yours?

Think about it. … And tell the women in your lives.

Make Me Up

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In my first blog post I talked about the Forbes article, 7 Ways You’re Hurting Your Daughter’s Future. Shane and I are doing a good job avoiding these 7 things that could hurt Charli’s future, except for one…

7. You criticize your own body, and/or other women’s bodies.

Let me be completely honest for a moment – I HATE talking about body image and appearance. There will always be someone skinnier and prettier than I am. There will always be someone who considers me to be skinnier and prettier than her. It’s a terrible, vicious cycle.

That being said, I know that I can teach Charlotte a lot of things about being an intelligent, successful woman.

I cannot teach her how to be self-confident [as it relates to appearance].

Why? Well, friends, I can’t teach what I don’t know. Therefore, I have set out on a mission to boost my own self-esteem.

Step 1: Make Me Up

I have never been good at hair and makeup. My best friend of 10+ years will attest to that! She’s been great about teaching me the basics of makeup application. She also taught me how to curl me hair with a curling iron when I was 16. Unfortunately, I’m not a great student when it comes to these things, so I recently became obsessed with a professional, Bobbi Brown.

I’ve been two of her books for makeup guidance and self-confidence boosters. Her newest book, Pretty Powerful, has been a blessing for my new makeup endeavors.

My attempts at improving my makeup skills are proving successful. I still have a lot to learn, but I’m much happier with my appearance now that I am forcing myself to wear makeup.

Here are a a couple before & after examples of the magic of makeup.

Angie 1 Self-Deprication 0
Makeup Before and After

Getting ready for Kristen’s birthday.

Makeup Before and After

Practicing for our ’20s holiday party. *Please note that I am only wearing eye makeup in the photo on the right – hence the circles under my eyes.

30 x 30

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I recently read a blog post by a friend that was about her 30 x 30 goals, and I loved the idea. Basically, she and another friend created the idea to set up bucket lists with milestones they would like to hit by the time they are 30, 40, 50, etc. For 30 years old, there are 30 goals.

I’ve been thinking a lot about what goals I would set for myself. It’s not as easy as I anticipated. Regardless, I need to set goals for myself – goals for me as a mom and as an individual.

Here it goes! My 30 x 30 goals in no particular order…

1. Take up yoga
2. Donate to Locks of Love
3. Volunteer more
4. Plan and execute at least one fundraiser for pancreatic cancer research
5. Have a children’s book published
6. Learn html
7. Strengthen my CSS “skills”
8. Earn a position as a manager or director of marketing
9. Start AND finish some of the DIY projects from my Pinterest
10. Taste test a recipe from my Yum! board once a month
11. Write a book for Charlotte each Christmas
12. Start a Christmas Tradition – adopt-a-family, food drive, something charitable
13. Start a Christmas Tradition – giving one homemade gift to each family member
14. Have my second baby
15. Get married
16. Give Shane’s house a much needed makeover
17. Buy a house
18. Adopt a dog
19. Plant a vegetable garden
20. Cook a holiday dinner all by myself
21. Give up soda
22. Refresh Spanish skills and possibly take some classes
23. Teach Charlotte basic Spanish with the help of her Papa
24. Learn how to do fun braids and hairstyles for Charli
25. Write a business plan for a maternity store in either Topeka or Manhattan
26. Keep Charlotte’s photo album up-to-date
27. Make sure Charli knows her grandparents who already passed away
28. Visit Canada
29. Fly over the ocean – preferably to Europe or Australia
30. Visit all 50 states*

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*I have already visited the gray states.