Can we just talk about Bear for a minute?

I realize that I sound like a crazy cat lady every time I write about her, but I can’t help it. It’s in my blood. My mom collected strays. My mom’s mom collects barnyard strays… I adopted one of said barnyard strays. It’s a cycle filled with felines.

Bear – my little bundle of pain – has developed emotional issues. Ok, that’s a lie. She has always been my emo, inbred kitten. If I had new roommates, she would “mark her territory,” aka pee on things.

There were a few occasions when she actually had a kitty UTI. She is going through this disaster right now. We think.

Cats should not get UTIs.

Why?

Because she spends 5 hours cleaning herself, 18 hours sleeping and 1 hour awkwardly staring at me. That should not result in somehow developing a UTI.

Regarldess, we’ve spent more than $500 during the last 3 months on her vet bills for this recurring issue. Finally, on Saturday, the vet told us to buy special overpriced urinary health, wet cat food.

Let me be clear – Bear hasn’t eaten wet cat food since she was a kitten. Five years ago.

I got her home from the vet and she was still slightly sedated, just enough so that when she walked forward her back legs would trail off to one side. And when she sat, she just stared at the floor like it’s spinning.

I put out the overpriced wet cat food and she went to town. That nasty cat food made the whole house smell like a warm non-descrip meat substance not unlike spam.

My bet was on HOS, but Bear was the one who lost her dinner.

All over the hallway.

*sigh*

HOS reminded me that she was my cat, so he would NOT be cleaning that up. Probably for the best. I didn’t need to ultimately clean up his vomit along with hers.

After cleaning up the spam-esque disaster spew, I spoke with the animal clinic that actually does have dry food. Nice. Thanks.

In the end, Bear has her dry urinary health food. I have to force feed her medicine that smells like liver. And Shane didn’t have to clean up the mess.

All for my beloved cat that may or may not be experiencing behavioral issues.

She peed on a power strip to the computer because I had been working remotely that day… At this point, behavior is the least of her problems.