I’m going to let you in on a secret that I learned very quickly after becoming a mom last July. New parents have no idea what they are doing. None of us. We stumble around in highly caffeinated semi-comas, rocking back-and-forth and randomly tearing up at Google commercials and anything happy, funny, angry, loving, hateful, nice, rude, sad…
We question our abilities as parents on a regular basis. So when Shane shared a Forbes article with me – 7 Ways You’re Hurting Your Daughter’s Future – I realized that my concerns are well-founded. There is a significant possibility I’m going to screw up my child. And then again, I may not.
I have read too many blogs and articles telling me things like kissing my daughter on the lips will give her cavity bacteria and how holding her will keep her from becoming independent.
The Forbes article was different. For one, it actually makes sense, and #7 really hit home.
7. You criticize your own body, and/or other women’s bodies.
Before getting pregnant with Charlotte, I was at my healthiest and most fit. I fondly dubbed that period of my life as the Skinny Summer. Thirty-five pounds gained and 28 pounds lost and hips, thighs and stomach stretch marks later, my self-esteem is at an all-time low. I frequently comment on my appearance as gross, disgusting or fat and it doesn’t phase me. The thought of my daughter inheriting a negative self-image has me thinking twice about myself and my goals as a mother.
Honestly, parenting isn’t the only thing I’m fumbling my way through. I don’t know very much about who I am yet. I do know that I want nothing more than to be the very best mom for Charli. The only way I know how to do that is to discover myself during the process of becoming a mom. Charlotte and I will grow together, and one day, when she is holding her own baby in her arms – elated, terrified and nervous – I’ll share this journey with her. How a mother and daughter (and amazing father and husband of sorts – Shane aka HOS) wrote their life story on this side of the rainbow.